Thursday, February 11, 2010

Where's My Iranian Punch?!

Now, I distinctly recall reading that Iran was coming out with a new punch today, that would shock the west it tasted so good. I imagine it's green, which would really come in handy at christmas time: I could put out Hawaian Punch and Iranian Punch.
 
But where the hell is the punch? And what flavor is it? Maybe Olive? Falafel? Date?
 
Personally, I think it's sheer marketing genius- Green punch ought to sell really well on the West Coast and the liberal states.
 
And I was even ready with some slogans for Iranian Punch:
 
"Tastes so Good, You'll Swear it was Made by a Prophet!"
 
"Holds your taste buds hostage- with pleasure!"
 
"Smoother than the thighs of 44 virgins! And without having to blow yourself up!"
 
"If this is the last drink you'll ever have- it'll be worth it!"
 
and finally
 
"Iranian Punch- a new drink for the Atomic Age!"
 

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